Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Facebook, Breast Cancer, and Why I'm Flashin' My Rack

I like playing on Facebook. It's the perfect social interaction for those of us who don't have time  to actually socialize much. I can update 312 people in less time than it takes me to make a single phone call, and I love that.

One of the downsides of social networking, though, is the "awareness trends." By gods, I hate them with the hatred of a thousand hatey suns. It's the repetitive copy'n'pasting of "If you know someone who _____ then we need to find a cure for  _____ and only 3% of people will have the (select one: courage, heart, gonads) to repost this! XOXOXOX heart heart heart." It's slacktivism at it's finest, the idea that somehow copy'n'pasting a status will help cure the disease du jour.

The type of "awareness trend" I hate the most, however, is the ones that start out as an message between women and all their girlfriends. "Post your favorite color/purse/shoe size/bodytemperature as your status to raise awareness for _____! Tee hee, don't tell the men!" And it always leads to 950 posts by people saying, "Purple! In the closet! 98!" But worse yet, it doesn't DO anything. Posting your bra size or the color of your socks or the name of your favorite childhood cartoon character doesn't do anything. It doesn't HELP anyone who has cancer, or diabetes, or who's being abused as a child. It just makes people feel like YAY I HALPED when really all they did was take up bandwidth and clutter my news feed.

It's not increasing awareness. Seriously - is there anyone who's NOT aware that breast cancer exists? Like some guy is reading his Facebook page and all of a sudden goes "OMG your purse is green? Thank goodness, now I'm aware of cancer!"

Here's the thing - if you really want to help someone who has cancer, get your ass over to their house and make dinner. Offer to watch their kids so they don't have to drag a couple of toddlers to a doctor's appointment. Come over and clean the house while they're too weak from chemo to stand.

Don't know anyone who has cancer? No problem - donate money to one of the reputable organizations that funnels money into cancer research. Because all the bullshit "awareness" doesn't mean anything if there's no money to make cancer - or these other diseases  - go away. There are plenty of places you can donate money, but the one I pitch in to each year is the Susan G. Komen Foundation. Next year in the spring, I'll be running in their annual Race for the Cure, but for now, I'm helping out by flashin' my boobs.

Yes. I'm flashing my boobs for money. The Tenth Annual Blogger Boobiethon is here, and they're collecting boobs and cash. Why? Because people like to look at boobs, and they'll pay money for it - and that money goes straight to either Komen or the Wendy's Cancer Relief Fund, to help with breast cancer research.

Silly? Yeah. But my boobs look pretty good, and if displaying them gets someone to donate $10 bucks to Komen, good enough for me. Because talking about your bra on Facebook is fine and dandy, but no one donates shit for it. Do you HAVE to donate to see the boobies on Boobiethon? Not at all. But you can. And I hope you do. Because donating money is a hell of a lot more useful than giggling about the color of your purse:

Second pair down, in the blue bra: Boobiethon 2011


  1. Bah! I HATE those Facebook trends with a fiery passion. I ranted about them the last time one appeared, and people came back with "it helps teh cancerz!". No, it bloody doesn't.

    Yay for you for doing something (yowzer!) that'll actually help!


    Adam, son of Hazel, breast cancer ass-kicker.

  2. Excellent post I'm sharing. :)

    And you're very brave...

  3. I hate that too - love this post - I'm going to share it because of what you wrote about trends. Maybe this will make them stop...probably not. I hate when they are so nasty about "oh I know who will repost this but most of you won't have the balls to do it." Right like I'm so worried about your opinion!

    Plus I hope you get a few extra donations - if you are going to support something get involved.

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